The Foot Bone’s Connected to The – Oh, You Don’t Need to Know THAT!

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What kind of person gets an A in a class, then makes an appointment with the chair of the department, complains about the class and the teacher, and walks away disgruntled.  With an A.  I mean, who DOES that?

Oh, yeah, that would be me.

I’m back and forth with whether or not to mention the name of the professor who taught – or didn’t teach – my Anatomy and Physiology I class.  I’ve mentioned the names of other professors on my blog, but those are people who gained my respect for their dedication to the art of education.

But do you mention the name of the man who has nearly set my educational goals back by four months?

In the words of my favorite comedian, John Pinette, I say, “Nay nay.”

It serves no real purpose to mention the professor’s name here.  I’ve already posted my review among the other intellectually inspired reviews at www.ratemyprofessor.com – and I didn’t use the word “Dude”, “Dope”, nor the popular phrase “DA BOMB”.  My review should stand out from the crowd that way.

After spending a semester with this professor, learning how much his wife hates him, his son disappoints him, and his knee needed surgery long before summer session 1, I’m still amazed at how much I didn’t learn.  Power Point presentations were displayed in a manner that even those students who HAD completed the Evelyn Woods speed reading class would have had a hard time keeping up, and more than half of the Power Point slides were deemed to be things we didn’t need to know.

If one day in the future, you’re sick, and the only nurse around is me, you may want to limit your aches and pains ONLY to the Power Point slides I actually got to see.  And if you’re ever browsing Rate My Professor to check out an instructor before taking a class, don’t put too much weight on the “red hot chili pepper” status.  I think some professors give that to themselves…..

I Love Cats – Especially With General Tso’s Sauce

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That’s a line I am borrowing from my husband, because honestly, I don’t care what you do to them, I am not a cat person.  I believe that cats, while they are living, are in a constant state of planning your demise.  They are hoping in silence that you are one of those crazy cat people who has left all of your worldly possessions to them in your will, and at whatever chance they find, they will trip you as you are going down the steps, smother you in your sleep, or sneak hairballs into your spaghetti so you choke to death.

And then there was Snowball.

I asked Bill, one of my lab partners, not to do it.  Please don’t name this cat that we are going to be required to dissect something that will endear it to our hearts.  Give it a name like Dexter – TVs infamous serial killer/forensics investigator.  Call it Garbage, and then we won’t mind so much when it gets tossed back into it’s clear, plastic trash bag home – permanently.

Not only does he give the cat a warm and fuzzy name like Snowball, so I can’t look it in the hermetically sealed eyes, but I also can’t ever watch the Simpsons again.  How could I watch as Lisa tosses a ball of string to their little cat, Snowball, and not get misty eyed over our Snowball?

If I have learned anything at all in my return to the world of academia, I have learned that I still do not like cats.

But I feel pretty darned awful for Snowball.

This is not the actual Snowball, may he rest in pieces.

Summer What?

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I laugh in the face of you summer vacationing people.  HaHa!  While you are lounging comfortably on your beaches, basking in the mountain sunshine, cruising the seven seas, and trekking across Europe, I am learning the ins and outs (although mostly ins) of the human body.  Ha….ha?

 

I have virtually vanished from the blogosphere as I crack down on the whole process of reading, writing, and wracking my brain to try and make sure that when I actually DO become a nurse, I don’t kill anyone.  Needlessly.  And damn, it’s tough!

Remember the song “The foot bone’s connected to the ankle bone” – you know it, we all sang it as children.  Yeah, well, don’t try to sing it in an effort to pass the bone practical in Anatomy and Physiology I – your instructor will not be amused.  And you Disney peeps – heading in humming the Hannah Montana bone song won’t get you very far either 🙁

So, the only basking I’m doing so far this summer is in the glory of the A on my transcript from A&P I.  And I’m hoping A&P II goes equally as well.

No go, you, get back to your summer, ummm, yeah, what’s that thing called again?  Oh yeah – VACATION!  You have to have fun for the both of us!

Reading, ‘Riting, ‘Rithmatic – oh, and Anatomy and Physiology

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I’ve done my best to blog like a madwomen these past couple of days because I have a dreadful feeling, my blog is about to go dark for a few weeks.

When I decided to go back to school, I focused on the important things – what cute book bags there are out there!  I don’t have to cook dinner if I take night classes!  I don’t have to do laundry if I take day classes!

Who knew there’d be all this studying and crap to do?  They want me to write papers, turn in assignments, and – GULP – study!  The nerve!

As I prepare for my summer classes – Anatomy and Physiology I and II AND (as if that wasn’t enough torture on myself) World Civilizations.  Oh yes.  The fun never ends in this house.

Summer vacation? HAH! Who needs fun in the sun and relaxation when you can be learning the foot bone is connected to the ankle bone, and the brain bone is disconnected when you have children?

So in case I don’t make it back, please disregard the email requests for urgent cash sent to Rome, where I’ve been hustled by Gypsy children, lost my passport and can’t get the Embassy to help me.  I won’t be in Rome.  If you get an email asking you to donate money for my kidney transplant, because I was left in a bathtub filled with ice after having a drink spiked at the Kool-Aid bar, just ignore it.  My kidneys are intact and still enclosed within my body, which will be in school.  All summer.

I’ll miss you guys.  I’ll get here whenever I can!